I have been LOST!

Lost to a world of moving where there is no connection to the outside world hardly at all!  Seriously, I've missed writing on here.

Tonight I feel:

• stressed
• depressed
• frustrated
• tired
• HUGE (seeing as how I'm 31 weeks preggo, this is totally justified)  =o)
• and above all worried.

There are so many things that have gone on and are going on that I feel as if I'm slowly losing my grip on reality... that being said, I read through some of my old posts and realized that I'm falling into some old habits that I've been trying so hard to end.

SO!  Here's how I'm going to end the night feeling:

• Hopeful
• Patient
• Relieved
• and yes, HUGE!  LOL!

Emmanuel Teney said, "As your faith is strengthened you will find that there is no longer the need to have a sense of control, that things will flow as they will, and that you will flow with them, to your great delight and benefit."

I also recall reading a passage in an article from our church magazine, The Ensign, entitled "Help Thou Mine Unbelief".  In this article, Elder L. Whitney Clayton says,

"No matter who we are or where we live, there is much about our daily lives that is routine and repetitive. As we go about this dailiness, we must be deliberate about doing the things that matter most. These must-do things include making room first for the minimum daily requirements of faithful behavior: true obedience, humble prayer, serious scripture study, and selfless service to others. No other daily vitamins strengthen the muscles of our faith as fast as these actions."

I also like this last quote for the night:

"Always continue the climb. It is possible for you to do whatever you choose, if you first get to know who you are and are willing to work with a power that is greater than ourselves to do it."  ~Ella Wheeler Wilcox

No matter how bad you're feeling tonight (and I promise, you're not alone) remember that tomorrow is a new day.  Start over and proceed with caution as you try to put what's really important into your day.  Have faith, hope and love for those around you (including yourself) and remember that I'm here, even though I've been gone for a while.... okay, I've been gone for a long time, I know.  5 months is a long time.

On to better things we go, right friends?

What do you accept?

"The only tyrant I accept in this world is the 'still small voice' within me."

~Mahatma Gandhi

What if all we ever heard was greatness?  What if every time someone (or ourselves) said something negative about us, we instantly heard "That's not true!" from inside ourselves?  

Seriously, think about it.

This last week I've focused on how awful I feel and how horrible life is sometimes because I'm in my first trimester of pregnancy and don't feel well and am so tired I could sleep at any given moment.  I've been a punk to those around me and I've been mean and rude and awful.   

Why am I being such a tyrant to, not only myself, but EVERYONE?

Because I've forgotten that there is that still small voice inside me.

There's someone there to tell me, "It's okay, I know how you feel.  Gather your courage, get up off the couch and be the woman, mother, spouse, friend, caregiver you need to be.  I'll never leave, I only step aside when you brush me off.  Let's do this and you'll be fine."

I bear witness to you that when that time comes and you need a friend, the best place to find one is on your knees.  He knows what you need more than anyone in the world and only He can help you find it.

Yes, life's hard.  Don't be the tyrant in someone's head that they have to fight against every day.

Tomorrow, I'm choosing to try harder.  I'm choosing to be better for everyone around me.

I am:

A wife, a mom, a healer, a cook, a dishwasher, a laundry-do-er, a friend, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, and whatever else you'd like to put me as, HOWEVER, I have decided I don't need to define anything anymore.  I can be all these and more without ever having to justify myself to anyone again.  I read the following article tonight and realized how completely clueless some people are that don't have children..... especially if they're friends with people that DO have kids.  Take a gander HERE and read this article.... TOO FUNNY!

I think my favorite line is the one that states: "...when you got your first 10 minutes to yourself, wanted to be alone with your thoughts instead of calling a good friend, a good friend wouldn't judge you, complain about you to mutual friends, or marvel how much more productively she uses her time. Either make a sincere effort to understand or keep your snit to yourself."

 This brings me to following thought:  Do we place ourselves higher than someone because it makes us feel better, or do we do it out of complete ignorance?  I sincerely hope it's out of ignorance that this kind of thing happens, but too often I find it's because of the other "reason". 

While reading through the comments on this article, I ran across someone who thought that all the parents adding things to the list of "what happens during the day" were complaining.  Then I remembered the old saying, "Think before you speak" or in this case type.  Some people have no filter and therefore fall into the following quote's range:

"Discussion is an exchange of knowledge; an argument an exchange of ignorance."

~Robert Quillen

How can you feel good about yourself by telling the people who are raising the next generation that they're doing an awful job.  Someday my friend, those next generation children (raised by the parents you bad-mouthed) could be your boss.  Think twice, will ya?

Open mouth, insert foot.

 

No, I'm not saying that everything I do is correct, and for that matter, it's not super interesting either, however, I've chosen to think before I act, speak, or react because what is important is something you have to think about before you say or do anything.

Example: Take for instance the 2-year-old that falls off the couch.  Looks to his mom for comfort and she says, "Whoa! That was a big fall, hop up!"  Said 2YR gets up, shakes it off and is up for another round.

On the other hand: The 2YR that falls off the couch and his mom says, "Oh!  Poor baby, come here, that must have hurt, are you okay?"  And the kid starts crying because Mom made a big deal out of it.

Or how about the newly wed wife who puts the dishes in the dishwasher every day the EXACT SAME WAY and her hubby, trying to help, loads them differently and runs it.  Yes, it takes 30 extra seconds to put it away, and no, it's not as "convenient" when the bowls are mixed in with the plates and cups.  But did he do it for the right reason?  Yes. Should she say thank you for him doing it without being asked? Of course!  Way to go Newly Wed Hubby!

I submit one last thought for the night: Actions speak louder than words.  What you're doing with your life says more about who you are than anything you can ever say (or even drive).

 

Good night folks!

It's Sunny!

Today is a sunny, glorious Monday!  I've already been to Facebook and checked how things are going for everyone and was surprised to see how many negative comments there are about this morning already!  HOW DARE YOU!  How dare you curse this beautiful day that the Lord has given us to rejoice in!  Things may be going bad in your opinion, but that's only your opinion... I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOUR NEGATIVITY!  I have this quote for the day:

I just don't deal with the negativity. I can't get involved in that side of it. I don't understand it, and you can't let it take away from your life and what you are trying to do.  ~Rick Pitino

Do I know him?  No.  But I love that he's so blunt about it.  "I can't get involved in that side of it."  And why would we want to???  What good is there that comes from being negative?  One thought like that leads to another and another and then to an awful downward cycle of negativity and depression!  NO THANKS!  Today I choose Optimism and Positivity and Happiness and JOY!  It's sunny here for the first time in WEEKS and I'm so glad to see it!  How dare you guys try to bring me down with your pessimistic ways.  Our purpose here is to uplift each other and bring the happiness that we want to have to others so they'll want it to!

Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain... To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices - today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.    ~Kevyn Aucoin

I did some research on this Kevyn Aucoin.... do I agree with his Lifestyle?  Definitely not!  But he had his head screwed on correctly and knew what to focus on.  He was a make-up artist born in Louisiana and his whole perspective was that women were already beautiful on the inside, make-up just helped them realize it on the outside.

Great thought, huh?

If our outsides truly mirrored our insides what would yours look like?  Would you like what your mirror reflected?  I don't know what mine would reflect for sure, but I'm hoping it would be beautiful.  I'm hoping that the positive attitude I'm working on developing would be shown  and that it would have made my reflection just a smidge less tattered overall.

Are you out there, whoever you are?

For a Dear Friend: You know who you are

My dear friend,

As time draws close for this battle you're struggling with, I want to give you words of a General Authority: President Boyd K. Packer of the 12 Apostles.  This comes from his talk "The Spirit of Revelation" that he gave in October 1999 at General Conference:

Young Latter-day Saints, shape up!  Face up!  Take hold of your lives!  Take control of your mind, your thoughts!  If you have friends that are not a good influence, make changes, even if you face loneliness, even rejection. 

If you have already made bad mistakes, there are ways to fix things up, and eventually it will be as though they never happened.

Sometimes guilt controls our minds and takes us prisoner in our thoughts.  How foolish to remain in prison when the door stands open.  Now, don't tell yourself that sin really doesn't matter.  that won't help; repentance will.

Take charge of yourself.  How wonderful to be a young Latter-day Saint in this wonderful, challenging time.

You're an amazing person and I know that this tough time will pass.  God doesn't give you things you can't handle and sometimes, when we feel like we're on the point of breaking, it's really just the edge of a breakthrough that we've needed for a long time.  He's making you a better LDS woman and will continue to uplift you if you let Him.

All my love and prayers, dear friend.

Lacey

Aristotle Once Said:

"We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit."

 How do you take a life's worth of bad habits (be them eating, not exercising, being pessimistic, whatever...) and start a change?

May I suggest this as an affirmation?

"Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds."  ~Albert Einstein~

This thought alone brings to mind the war that we wage against our "Natural Man" every day in all that we do.  We are GREAT SPIRITS!  We have been chosen to come forth in a day of turmoil and greed to bring joy to those around us and to lift the hearts and spirits of those that need help!  We were sent to be a guiding light to those around us but in order to do that we need to step away from our "mediocre minds" that the world has placed as a block for our spiritual minds.  Sometimes we are our own worst enemies and our own worst critics.  

I am my own worst enemy.  I am my WORST critic.  I pick on myself and I don't give myself the credit I should for the good things I do.  I guilt trip myself into doing things.  I try to make myself not feel guilty for doing things I know better than to do.  I accept complete responsibility for all of this because I'm the one in charge of my choices.

But I'm going to change it all because I'm the one in charge of my choices!

Today I will cheer for myself for my little accomplishments... Like yesterday when I reached for 3 clementines instead of a piece of chocolate cake (and if you know me, you know that's my weakness).

VICTORY! 

Or like this morning when I marched my daughter upstairs very calmly without shouting because she'd upset me.

VICTORY!

We all need victory in our lives.  Tell me what your victories are; I'd love to cheer for you too!

   P.S. I already planned a victory for tomorrow: EXERCISING!  It doesn't matter what I do, just so long as I get in 30 minutes of exercise.... treadmill, yoga, cardio videos... whatever!  It's a planned one I can celebrate for sure!

Bumblebees and Butterflies

"Aerodynamically, the bumble bee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumble bee doesn't know it so it goes on flying anyway."

                 ~Mary Kay Ash~ 

Personally, I love this quote!  Does it really matter what other people tell us we can or cannot do?  I submit that it does not!  Sometimes we get so wrapped up in what we think other people think we can do or what we think we can't do that we just don't do anything!

I'm tired of it!

I'm tired of mediocrity and I'm tired of women not realizing that they are daughters of a God who is so amazing that He created us so we could bless the lives of others!  We need to realize we are bumble bees on the inside and that will help us be butterflies on the outside!

Mary Kay also said:

"So many women just don't know how great they really are. They come to us all vogue outside and vague on the inside." 

We need to remember that what's on the inside will make whatever is on the outside 10 times better!  We can't be ugly on the inside and still feel like butterflies on the outside!  

My goal this year:

To help women (and myself) realize just how beautiful they are and understand that in a world where you can be anything you want to be, WOMEN, whether they're old, young, tall, short, motorcycle riders, moms, WHATEVER! have the right to be the bumble bee they want to be without judgment.  We need to know that being butterflies on the outside is only a tiny piece of who we really are! We need to realize that you can have bumble bee wings on a butterfly's body! You're the only person who's opinion matters.

And if you don't know who you are: come with me.... let's find out! 

This post is brought to you as I'm making a HUGE decision.  As a Mary Kay Beauty Consultant, I've learned the Mary Kay-isms.... I've heard these things a million times but have never really put them into effect.  I'm choosing today to take my business to the next level and party with 500 women to make them feel special (completely for free) and help them realize their beauty by June 15th!

It almost makes me want to vomit because it scares me so bad, but "[w]e fail forward to success!"  Here's to the biggest jump so far!  Wish me luck and if you want, you can keep track on the ticker to the left.